Monday, 31 August 2009
Ok so maybe i had overdone it yesterday and felt like I was a young and healthy man of 20 again! My lower back has given up the fight this morning which in itself is an inconvenience for anyone, but when your nearly 20 stone and on crutches with a broken leg its a bloody nightmare!
I have taken my maximum dose of meds this morning in the hope that i may be able to ease the pain and have some quality to the day. I am annoyed with it more than disappointed, its frustrating to have such a good day only to be knocked backwards.
Do i feel sorry for myself?
I know i shouldn't, what with all the disabled people out there who just get on with it without a complaint. But i do, I have been registered disabled now for a long time and I had managed to get myself back to full time work and establish some form medium where work/home life is concerned. Just when things are looking like they could be changing in our favour another spanner comes along to chew up my plans!
That is probably life you may say.... Your probably right.
I will stop the self pity now(for today anyway!).
I managed to upload a couple of images last night, the first time in a long while I have edited anything... I enjoyed it...
See what you think...
This one is from a set I did for a birthday celebration. Julie(right) and Gail(left).
This one was taken on the way home one evening before my disability took control again.
Now normally i would of cloned out the distractions in the picture, but thought as i was having so many in my life why not leave them in!
Sunday, 30 August 2009
The camera was taken on the day of his wedding and therefore contained the prized footage of the happy couples day. Cory, pictured above with his then fiancé Amy are said to be devastated at the prospect of not having their memories of the day to look back on in the future.
If you have any information on the whereabouts of the camera or the footage please call Cory on 07970 771 540.
Sent by iPhone 3G
I have woken up today with very little pain(compared to normal) in my leg and its amazing the difference it can make to your attitude when you have a good day.
I feel so good today, I have even decided to take my camera out with me if we decide to go anywhere.
I am almost too frightened to believe that this could be the start of the road to recovery i have been looking for, worried what may lay around the corner for me...
That said, today i am positive.
That is all that matters...
Have a great day.
Friday, 28 August 2009
Tuesday, 25 August 2009
Saturday, 22 August 2009
Friday, 21 August 2009
as have the shape of my knee.
My wife insisted I head down to the hospital today as it was looking
likely that one of the metal screws in the knee was poking out the
side of my leg!
To cut a long and painful story short. I have to have another
operation to repair the loose screw in my leg!
Bloody sick of it now.
Sent from iPhone 3G
Friday, 14 August 2009
A bit of background....
From an early age i was big, i have partly blamed this on my childhood. No, i have no horrible story of neglect and maltreatment which caused me to comfort eat every day!
For me, it was in my opinion love that made me have a big appetite and metabolism. My Mother and Father never had a lot of possessions whilst growing up, in fact they like many others in that era were poor and had to get by on whatever was available.
This was the case with meal times, whatever was available was eaten. If nothing was available then you waited for the next meal.
This rubbed off on my mother, who when married to my father held down three jobs whilst i was growing up with my brothers, my father worked long hours at British Rail. With this new found independence and income we were guaranteed three square meals a day.
By the age of eight I was getting rather chubby and started to experience the negative side of the world - Bullying! I spent many years as the brunt of peoples jokes, and although i have no real memory left of those years (due to my accident)I realise that it affected me beyond comprehension. The loneliness of being bullied is horrible, a feeling that you can not wash off even though you want to.
So, my reason for all of this crappy mind digging?
I need to loose weight, i have no choice. If i want to see my son grow up then i have to take a long hard look at myself, my eating habits and my life!
I have a plan, I have an appointment at the doctors later and will ask him about eating plans and any help available. I will also ask him for a repeat prescription of the weight loss tablets that I was taking some time ago. I have to do this, no matter how difficult it is for me to exercise and loose weight it is not impossible... There must be some exercises a disabled person can do safely.
I believe I need to do this in the public eye, I have been ridiculed and bullied for the majority of my young life. I am a grown man now with a family of my own, I am a good man who despite the damming words and looks of people over the years has survived relatively unscathed...
Ideas and suggestions are welcomed.....
Ok, so i went to the doctors and got another prescription for Xenical which is not the one i wanted but due to the new Warfarin tablets i now have to take he could not prescribe those.
It all kicks off on Monday....
It's no small task I can tell you, along with looking after our 4 year old Son, cleaning, cooking, dealing with our 3 dogs, driving me to and from appointments and generally being on hand 24 hours a day! I wish I had the means to treat her when I am better, she deserves it.
Tuesday, 11 August 2009
I have recently been following some blogs and some AudioBoo's and have noticed how open and honest some people are about their lives, feelings and dreams. All this in full view of the worlds Internet audience!
I find myself questioning if this new social revelation that we seem to be going through is doing us more damage than good. Is this kind of social interaction replacing "the chat over coffee?"
On the one hand, it can be a lifeline to some people who are either not able to get out of the house or for one reason or another are not willing to socialize.
The problem i have found is we are living in a "easy" society, by that i mean we seem to take the easy route to get what we want, this often proves not to be a good thing. This is true with regards socializing , why spend money going out to socialize when you can do it for free?
I have found that it is often difficult to motivate myself to socialize, preferring the comfort of my own space. Many of you may relate to this, its the easiest path and one which does not demand too much energy!
How sad is that?
Thing is, once I do push myself to socialize and get out i absolutely love it and never want it to end, but with all the easier options like the Internet and social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter and Myspace what does the future hold for the human race?
The one group that does not seem to be affected by this plague of social shyness is the "geeks" of the Internet world, they almost meet socially more than they used to. Maybe they are plotting against the rest of the world to turn us all into sofa sitting net users who eat, sleep and make babies via the Internet!
Mmmmm, Maybe, just maybe.....
Friday, 7 August 2009
This is my intention.
What do I want for myself and my family?
1. Get well.
I need to get to a stable scenario whereby I can physically return to work.
2. Manage my finances.
I need to be able to manage my finances better and start thinking about tomorrow and not be drawn into the latest technology rich gadget!
(although I still want a mac!) :-)
3. Return to the property ladder.
My physical situation has robbed me and my family of a home once before, I aim to be in a position where this does not happen again.
4. Be happy with what I have got.
I have been lucky with my life, I have been at deaths door on more than one occasion and I need to appreciate things a little more.
5. Be more adventurous.
I don't mean in bed(although Ruth may disagree!) I am talking about taking a hot air balloon ride, or my first plane flight!
6. Be more trusting.
I have been so suspicious of people and their intentions due to my past situations and disappointments, this needs to change if I ever want go grow.
I do not think this wish list is too much to ask for, it's down to me
to make it happen.
Sent from iPhone 3G